Dating

None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.

How this was put together

If you only read a few

  1. Interact with people and ask them out to find a relationship.

    It is necessary even if it feels like effort.

    one person who lived it

  2. Boost confidence for dating by making simple appearance changes like getting a new haircut, buying a new shirt, or using teeth whitening strips.

    Lack of confidence in appearance can prevent you from wanting to date.

    one person who lived it

  3. Read 'Double You Dating' by David DeAngelo to help with confidence.

    it may help with confidence, though the technique might be stale in today's dating games

    • technique may be stale

    one person who lived it

  4. Try to form initial connections in person instead of relying exclusively on apps.

    One person finds it easier to connect in person because the lack of body language on apps is painful.

    • This is one person's personal experience.

    one person who lived it

  5. Avoid mentioning a woman's fertility or looking for someone of a 'fertile age' when dating.

    It is a huge turnoff.

    one person who lived it

  1. Go on many first dates to build confidence, explore your city, and figure out what you like in partners.

    One person reported this helped them become more confident and clarify preferences.

    one person who lived it

  2. Keep quiet about reading seduction manuals.

    Many women despise such manuals and will avoid anyone who hints at manipulation.

    one person who lived it

  3. Own your differences as a superpower rather than overthinking or focusing on being single.

    Being different is described as how you attract partners.

    one person who lived it

  4. Approach life as though you are already enough, seeking to share yourself rather than get something from others.

    one person who lived it

3 more on this
  1. Use dating sites to initiate romantic connections when in-person opportunities are limited.

    It is suggested as a strategy during times like the pandemic when meeting people is tough.

    one person who lived it

  2. Avoid acting like a victim, claiming entitlement, or forcing outcomes in dating.

    These behaviors are incredibly unattractive.

    one person who lived it

  3. Focus on building confidence, ambition, and emotional stability over sexual experience.

    These traits are more attractive than an ego centered around body count.

    one person who lived it

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