Gender identity

None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.

How this was put together

If you only read a few

  1. Love and take care of yourself first.

    It conveys honest, humble confidence that is not toxic.

    one person who lived it

  2. Keep your promises to both yourself and others.

    This is described as a trait of a true man.

    one person who lived it

    • Think before you speak or act.1
  3. Look up 'tomboy femme fashion' to find a style that allows you to own your tomboy nature while feeling feminine.

    It is freeing to accept yourself.

    one person who lived it

  4. State your genuine interests openly, even if they differ from common topics like sports, to find people who respect your authenticity.

    People tend to respect you more when you are proud of being yourself.

    one person who lived it

  1. Make good male friends to improve confidence through bonding; one person stated this improved their confidence more than anything else.

    Men need male bonding.

    one person who lived it

  2. If you think you are weak, either accept that fact or become so strong that you rationally know you are not.

    one person who lived it

  3. Take up physical training that requires discipline to callous your mind; the specific form does not matter.

    Discipline-based training helps callous your mind.

    one person who lived it

  4. Build confidence by reading books, finding hobbies, and getting good at things you enjoy.

    The knowledge and skills acquired over time build confidence, which is central to masculinity.

    one person who lived it

7 more on this
  1. Apply witch hazel to shaved areas to prevent razor burn.

    It is a lifesaver for razor burn.

    one person who lived it

  2. Lift heavy compound weights such as squats, deadlifts, and bench presses.

    These exercises contribute to a masculine appearance similar to that of powerlifters.

    one person who lived it

  3. Admit that you do not know and remain open to learning, questioning the given, and testing ideas.

    one person who lived it

  4. Be vulnerable to gain acceptance and self-acceptance.

    Vulnerability is required to get acceptance.

    one person who lived it

  5. Recognize that hyper-masculine 'fuckboy' behavior is often performed to impress other men and assert dominance, not to attract women.

    Most women do not care about this behavior.

    one person who lived it

  6. Cultivate confidence as an attractive quality.

    Confidence may be a universally attractive trait.

    one person who lived it

  7. Define masculinity through purpose, mission, leadership, and groundedness rather than aggression, insults, or violence.

    one person who lived it

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