Community service
None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.
If you only read a few
Spend time with older people to learn from their life experience.
They are an invaluable source of wisdom and have experienced most things you will encounter in life.
- Age does not automatically bring serenity and wisdom; some elderly people remain stubborn or hold prejudiced views.
- Some may have made poor financial decisions.
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- Spend time with elderly people because one day they won't be there.1
Read devotionals or religious texts aloud to elderly relatives who can no longer read well.
Faith is often very important to them, and the time spent means a great deal.
one person who lived it
Set up a room in the home for future caregivers or family members who may need to stay as care needs increase.
Care needs often progress from a few hours a week to 24-hour care, requiring space for someone to move in.
one person who lived it
Take elderly relatives out for one-on-one meals and ask specific questions about their life history, such as holiday foods, hair styling methods from the 40s, teenage hobbies, or who taught them to drive.
Those are amazing conversations!
one person who lived it
Invite friendly elderly neighbors for coffee at your place or theirs to build friendship.
Listening to their stories can be valuable; some are worth writing down or recording with permission.
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Consider spending spring break or holidays with elderly grandparents instead of taking typical vacations.
One person found this approach resulted in the best spring break of their life, particularly after a spouse's death.
- This may cause conflict with family members who expect you to join other plans.
one person who lived it
Share extra food from cooking or baking with elderly neighbors by saying guests cancelled.
To prevent food from going to waste.
one person who lived it
Never gift a puppy without prior discussion, as it is a long-term commitment that requires readiness.
Many dogs are abandoned because recipients are not ready for the commitment.
one person who lived it
Offer to perform small chores like clearing gutters or changing light bulbs in exchange for a neighbor holding your parcels when you are away.
It works well for both parties.
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Explain modern flat-rate phone billing to elderly relatives who may hang up early due to outdated fears of high costs.
They may believe international or long calls are expensive and want to save you money.
one person who lived it
Perform mundane household chores while calling loved ones to make both tasks pass faster.
It makes both the chores and the call go by faster.
one person who lived it
Use a translator and bring in family to work together when sorting out legal affairs for non-English speaking elders.
Inability to speak the language makes handling problems much worse.
one person who lived it
Organize regular visits to senior homes to help with technology or play games.
Seniors may buy devices specifically to interact with visitors.
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Listen to stories about how the local area looked decades ago.
The stories are fascinating.
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Be aware that some pet boarding facilities require appointments for first visits to protect existing dogs and ensure quality intake time.
Facilities limit new dogs per day to spend quality time ensuring comfort and safe integration with other dogs.
one person who lived it
If you choose to casually interact with elderly people in public by commiserating, joking, or asking questions, be prepared that some may react negatively or tell you to mind your own business.
It can reassure them they are seen.
one person who lived it
Speak distinctly and louder if necessary, ensuring your mouth is visible for lip-reading, when talking to elderly people with hearing difficulties.
They often read lips; ignoring this makes conversation impossible.
one person who lived it
Save voicemails from elderly relatives to preserve their voices and memories.
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Bring favorite foods or small gifts to elderly relatives in care facilities.
It brings them significant happiness.
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Consult local medics or EMTs for their assessment of a nursing home's behind-the-scenes operations and staff quality.
Medics and EMTs visit frequently and observe conditions that are not visible to typical visitors.
one person who lived it
Send handwritten cards or make quick phone calls to elderly relatives if you cannot visit in person.
one person who lived it
Contact the activities coordinator at assisted living facilities to volunteer.
Facilities appreciate volunteers.
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