Saying no
None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.
If someone questions your plans for an outing you declined, do not disclose what you are doing instead.
It is not their business.
one person who lived it
Suggest to the parent that they let the child greet you spontaneously first, intervening only if the child does not initiate.
This helps let the child feel at ease.
one person who lived it
Offer children a choice of greetings that includes at least one non-physical option, such as waving.
This makes the child feel safe and respected, which tones down their flight response.
one person who lived it
Frame your need for solitude as recharging to be a better partner, rather than as rejection.
It prevents the relationship from deteriorating and allows you to activate 'husband mode' again.
one person who lived it
4 more on this
Do not engage with family members who try to make you feel guilty; practice saying no without providing any reason other than that your money is allocated.
Giving reasons feeds discussions about your spending choices.
one person who lived it
Accept that if family members cannot understand that you do not know something or do not believe you, it is a deeper issue you cannot control.
one person who lived it
When refusing due to lack of experience, explicitly state that you have never done anything with that specific topic to reinforce that you are not an expert.
This normally reminds family that you don't know everything about all things electronic.
one person who lived it
For vague computer issues, admit you cannot fix them yourself and suggest taking the device to a professional if it is not a known issue.
one person who lived it