Borrowing

None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.

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If you only read a few

As a lender, only lend items you can afford to lose; as a borrower, only borrow items you can afford to replace.
If you cannot afford to consider the item gone, do not loan it.
- Only lend to people who can afford to replace the item if they break it.
6 people, independently
- Only lend items you are willing to permanently lose.6
- Keep cheap pens or pencils specifically for lending so you do not risk losing your favorite writing instruments.11
Remove caps from pens before lending them out to discourage theft.
People are less likely to steal or keep pens without caps, as they may regret the loss or be hesitant to return a capless pen.
- Some may believe the borrower thinks they lost the cap.
2 people, independently
Respect borrowed tools more than your own by returning them cleaner and in better condition than received.
Returning dirty tools results in losing the privilege to borrow again.
- Do not perform unsolicited maintenance on borrowed items.
5 people, independently
- Immediately inform the owner if you break a borrowed tool.1
Mark your tools with spray paint dots to identify them if they are borrowed and not returned.
This allows you to know 100% that the tool is yours when a neighbor acts like it is theirs months later.
one person who lived it

Offer to drive friends or help transport items yourself instead of lending them your car.
This keeps you in control of your vehicle and allows you to spend time with the friend.
one person who lived it
Do not wash a borrowed car unless you know how to properly clean that specific vehicle or have explicit permission.
Improper washing can cause micro-scratches, damage sealants, or cause electrical faults in electric vehicles.
- A good wash may encourage future borrowing requests if the owner does not detail their car themselves.
4 people, independently
- Do not wash someone else's car unless explicitly asked.1
Buy your own equipment if you need to use it more than once.
Needing an item a second time indicates you actually need it.
one person who lived it
Ask for the number they need to call, dial it yourself, and hand the phone over only after you hear it ringing.
This helps verify that the person is legitimate.
one person who lived it

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Take a photo of the borrower with the item to create a timestamped record of the transaction.
This provides proof of who has the item and when.
- May make friends think you are a distrusting asshole.
one person who lived it
- Take photos of handing over and receiving borrowed items to prove return and avoid false accusations of theft.1
Share large, infrequently used items with neighbors to split costs.
One person reported spending half the money by sharing a snowblower and pressure washer with a neighbor.
one person who lived it
Use click or twist pens instead of pens with caps to reduce the risk of losing parts.
Pens with caps are prone to loss.
one person who lived it
Consider renting a vehicle instead of borrowing one if the cost of gas and care exceeds the rental price.
It may be cheaper to rent than to provide fuel and maintenance for a borrowed item.
one person who lived it
If you damage a loaned object, repair it or swap it for one of comparable value.
3 people, independently
Wash clothing before returning it rather than simply folding it.
Folding does not return the item in better shape.
one person who lived it
Ask the owner to show you how to operate complex tools, such as power tools, before borrowing them.
This ensures correct usage and allows the owner to verify the tool is working.
- Owners may refuse to lend the item if asked for a demonstration.
one person who lived it
- Ask the owner to demonstrate that an item works properly in front of you before borrowing it.1
When lending small items to students or employees, require them to leave a student ID or other personal item as collateral.
Students who do not genuinely need the item will often 'remember' they have one once asked for collateral.
- Do not use this method with friends, as it may damage the relationship.
one person who lived it
- Ask a borrower to leave a personal item as collateral to ensure the return of what they borrowed.3
Keep a supply of inexpensive 'throw-away' pens for strangers or clients to sign documents.
People you contact may have questionable hygiene, and it is common not to get pens back.
one person who lived it
Chew up or damage cheap pens before lending them so borrowers will not want to keep them.
Disgusting-looking pens are unlikely to be kept by borrowers, prompting them to return the item or decide they do not need it.
2 people, independently
- Name your pens and tell the borrower the name when lending them.1
Politely ask "you got it?" when handing over heavy or fragile items to confirm the recipient has a secure grip.
It makes the handoff much smoother.
one person who lived it
Check fluid levels and fix minor mechanical problems inexpensively on borrowed cars.
People actually like loaning their cars when you do this.
one person who lived it
Ask the library for the ISBN of a lost or damaged book before buying a replacement to ensure you get the correct edition.
Matching the ISBN allows for a quick replacement.
one person who lived it
Remove trash, such as used condoms, from borrowed vehicles before returning them.
Removing trash improves the quality of the vehicle.
one person who lived it
Place a brightly colored cap on a black marker to deter theft.
3 people, independently
Adopt a 'no borrowing books' policy to avoid pressure and awkwardness.
Borrowing books can create unwanted pressure to read them in a timely manner.
one person who lived it
Clean borrowed equipment and fill its fuel tank before returning it.
4 people, independently
Restore the seat, radio, and other controls to their original positions when returning a borrowed car.
- Some suggest that being this anal about details means you shouldn't loan your car.
3 people, independently