Emotional intelligence
None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.
Answer criticism with a calm or positive tone instead of anger or excuses.
Anger and excuses tend to make things worse, while a gentle reply can defuse tension.
- Some view responding politely even when wrong as being a pushover.
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Treat people kindly without seeking a reward or needing a reason.
Genuine kindness is not driven by an attempt to gain something from the act.
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Admit when you are wrong or have made a mistake.
People generally like those who do so, and it can counterintuitively increase respect for your opinions and trustworthiness.
- Some people may view you as naive.
- You may experience people exploiting your admissions or apologies.
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Confidently state 'I don't know' or 'I'm not familiar with that' when you lack knowledge.
- Following up with 'but I'm finding out' may still sound pretentious to some.
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When at fault, own the mistake instead of shifting blame or offering excuses.
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Learn to say no to requests for help and enforce boundaries to avoid being taken advantage of, even if you are known as a helper.
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Apply Hanlon's Razor: assume ignorance or carelessness rather than malice when explaining behavior, particularly during initial encounters.
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Acknowledge mistakes to reduce the likelihood of repeating them, as failing to acknowledge and learn from errors dooms one to repeat them.
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