Personality types
None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.
If you only read a few
Take your time with potential partners to give them trust, understanding, and respect.
One person reported this approach led to being loved for who they are.
- Based on a single anecdote
one person who lived it
Tell yourself you are an extrovert to normalize speaking to strangers.
One person reported this made speaking to random people a normal part of their day.
- Based on one person's experience.
one person who lived it
If you do not like your current career, consider going back to college or learning a craft.
It might make you happier.
one person who lived it
Accept that many people dislike small talk and may choose not to engage in it.
They may prefer 'real' conversations over small talk.
one person who lived it
Establish regular social rituals, such as weekly meals, to ensure people have a good time while using the commitment as an excuse to decline other interactions.
You can say you don't have time to chat now but are excited to hear about it later.
one person who lived it
If you want to cut down on unstructured socializing with coworkers, seek a career with billable hours or strict time accounting.
Every minute is accounted for, leaving little room for long drawn out conversations.
one person who lived it
Slowly push your boundaries by engaging a little more each time rather than avoiding interaction.
One person found this approach helped them overcome a hatred of phone use by eventually manning helplines.
one person who lived it
Practice approaching people even if you sense they are not interested, using low-commitment offers like exchanging numbers for a specific future activity.
Expecting rejection reduces worry about it.
- Use only when you expect they won't contact you.
one person who lived it
Communicate genuinely by not holding yourself back.
One person found this allowed them to form better connections.
one person who lived it
4 more on this
Actively engage with others in any setting, accepting that mistakes are a natural part of making friends.
Being around others helps you make friends despite inevitable mistakes.
one person who lived it
Share thoughts or jokes immediately during conversations rather than waiting for a break.
Waiting often causes the moment to pass, making the observation no longer relevant.
one person who lived it
Accept that entertaining yourself alone is valid and that you may not desire frequent social interaction.
one person who lived it
Act according to your current desired identity without validating others' past perceptions of you.
one person who lived it