Physical contact
None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.
If you only read a few
Cuddle with a cat or dog to receive warm physical contact.
Pets provide warm bodies and loving purrs that can help you fall asleep.
2 people, independently
Volunteer at nursing homes or animal shelters to receive hugs and comfort without the responsibility of full-time pet ownership.
These settings provide physical touch and the feeling of giving back.
- NICU volunteering to hold babies may be restricted to staff only.
2 people, independently
Use humor, such as saying 'it bites', to defuse tension while putting them on notice.
Humor can defuse the tension of crossing a line.
one person who lived it
Try martial arts to become comfortable with non-personal physical contact and gain self-confidence.
It helps you be comfortable with many things in life and gains confidence in yourself.
one person who lived it
Do not assume you can touch someone just because others can.
Individual comfort levels vary.
one person who lived it
Push the unwanted hand away directly.
Touching without consent is rude.
one person who lived it
Say 'Don't touch me' directly and practice until it no longer phases you.
It is inappropriate behavior, so saving their feelings is unnecessary.
one person who lived it
Give yourself a tight self-hug to satisfy the body's need for touch.
The body reportedly cannot distinguish between self-touch and touch from another person.
one person who lived it
Sit next to a date rather than across from them to create logistical opportunities for natural physical contact.
Sitting side-by-side makes you able to touch them.
one person who lived it
8 more on this
Recognize that unexpected touching from strangers in public is likely inappropriate behavior rather than a social norm.
Unwanted touching is technically battery and may result in legal charges.
- Such behavior often occurs when people are drunk.
one person who lived it
Step back physically to create distance when someone approaches your hair.
Physical movement is a distinct and noticeable way to communicate the message.
one person who lived it
Avoid touching people's hair unless you are in a romantic relationship or have explicit consent.
It is often perceived as weird or invasive otherwise.
one person who lived it
Lean away and say 'No thank you' firmly.
This combination is considered polite while setting a boundary.
one person who lived it
Ask directly if a friend is open to physical contact, especially if they are already physically affectionate with you.
People usually do not initiate actions they do not want done to them.
one person who lived it
If you avoid physical touch, say 'consider yourself hugged' to acknowledge affection without contact.
One person reported that their stepdaughter appreciated this approach.
- Based on one person's experience with a non-hugging stepdaughter.
one person who lived it
Never touch strangers or acquaintances; only touch people you are already comfortable with.
Touching becomes more socially acceptable as you get closer and more comfortable with someone.
one person who lived it
Continue using appropriate physical contact if the other person reacts positively and reciprocates by touching you back.
Reciprocation is a cue that physical contact is welcome.
one person who lived it