Social media

None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.

How this was put together

If you only read a few

  1. Focus on real-world social interactions over social media engagement.

    Social media cannot replace true social interactions; speaking in real life is more social. Social media is described as an online competition where people scroll through pictures of others who make them feel worse about themselves.

    3 people, independently

  2. Stop posting to please others or play pretend, as genuine connections will accept and love you without a mask.

    People who genuinely love you will do so without requiring you to perform for their happiness.

    one person who lived it

  3. Unfollow friends who post bragging, whining, or stupid content to curate a cleaner feed.

    It leaves a feed full of liked pages or non-annoying friends.

    one person who lived it

  4. Block notifications for specific apps so you can check them only at your own leisure, removing any obligation.

    It helped one person feel much better after a month.

    one person who lived it

  5. Directly message or tag a specific friend after making a public offer if they seem shy, but do not bring it up again afterward.

    Encouragement helps those who doubt the offer is meant for them.

    • Bringing it up again after messaging can make it seem creepy.

    one person who lived it

  1. Seek out close friendships with people who share your dislike of social media.

    One person found this helped them value few friendships over many.

    one person who lived it

  2. Keep your social media account but unfollow everyone to save time and energy while remaining able to check in if needed.

    It prevents the platform from zapping all of your time and energy.

    one person who lived it

  3. Reframe missing out on social media as avoiding sponsored posts, online gossip, outrage-baiting news, and negativity.

    These are things you shouldn't see in the first place.

    one person who lived it

  4. One approach that helped a high school freshman gain followers with rare posting: follow meme accounts and provide funny comments to earn shoutouts.

    • based on one person's experience

    one person who lived it

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  1. Frame not using social media as a positive trait or conversation topic, noting that some find it impressive or attractive.

    Some people say it is impressive, ask why, or find men without social media more attractive.

    one person who lived it

  2. Recognize that social media creates an illusion of many connections; focus energy on the small circle of friends who are actually available to you.

    Scrolling through stories of people you barely know gives a false sense of connection compared to close friends who are reachable by call or text.

    one person who lived it

  3. Identify activities you enjoy doing alone, then join local groups for those specific hobbies to meet people naturally.

    It prevents forcing yourself to like things just to be around others.

    one person who lived it

  4. Treat social media as optional 'candy' rather than a necessity for socialization.

    Too much use can negatively affect your well-being, while none is better than excess.

    2 people, independently

  5. View having few followers as a sign of independence from external validation rather than something embarrassing.

    Having lots of followers means nothing in the real world and does not reflect who you are.

    one person who lived it

  6. If quitting social media leads to isolation, use it with moderation to reconnect with old friends and join communities.

    Quitting entirely can result in losing connection with most old friends.

    one person who lived it

  7. Address problems or give compliments in person rather than online.

    Doing so helps avoid becoming socially inept or person-avoidant.

    one person who lived it

  8. Before leaving social media, tell people you are going offline and collect their phone numbers to maintain contact.

    People often rely on social media for updates rather than texting everyone individually.

    one person who lived it

  9. Follow your curiosity and learn things that interest you to naturally meet people with similar interests.

    One person reported finding friends this way without explicitly seeking them.

    one person who lived it

  10. Act casually friendly toward classmates to build familiarity over time.

    Repeated normal interactions help people see you as a regular classmate rather than an outlier.

    one person who lived it

  11. Avoid posting repetitive explanations about Memorial Day etiquette on social media every year.

    Friends have likely seen these memes for years.

    one person who lived it

  12. Explain your lack of social media usage by citing concerns about unrealistic expectations and comparison culture.

    Comparing lives to others' highlight reels can be draining; this explanation can also serve as a relatable conversation topic if delivered without bitterness.

    one person who lived it

  13. Maintain friendships through real-world interaction, one-on-one time, online games, or calls instead of relying solely on technology.

    Technology cannot fully fulfill the human need for socialization as as non-technological interaction.

    one person who lived it

  14. Keep life private, real, and peaceful, delaying stimulation from social media until it serves a good, better, or developing purpose.

    one person who lived it

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