Harassment
None of this is expert advice. It's what people worked out for themselves, usually the hard way — what actually helped, and what they'd tell someone standing where you are. Take what fits and leave the rest.
If you only read a few
Report the behavior to Human Resources if direct requests fail.
HR is responsible for handling disputes and ensuring a safe workplace to cut down on legal risk.
- HR policies vary wildly; some are helpful while others may be cold and distant.
one person who lived it
Place mirrors at your desk to see behind you and brace for incoming projectiles.
It helps you see behind you so you can brace for it.
one person who lived it
Tell the coworker directly that you know they are staring at you.
They will eventually see that you know and start feeling uncomfortable.
one person who lived it
Use the phrase 'Can I help you?' as a verbal prompt to put them on notice without being aggressive.
It is considered the least aggressive option.
one person who lived it
Consider leaving your job if the coworker does not stop after your request and HR is not a viable option.
one person who lived it
One approach some people used to avoid weekly pestering from a colleague was to agree to requests but then not show up.
one person who lived it
Write down the date, time, location, and reactions for every incident to prepare for potential HR or legal confrontation.
This prepares you for confrontations involving HR, legal departments, lawyers, or courts.
one person who lived it
If someone is flirting inappropriately, try giving them professional validation for their work instead of engaging with the flirtation.
This may satisfy their craving for attention and remove the incentive to flirt.
one person who lived it
Consider that the coworker might be staring because of interesting clothing or accessories, not necessarily sexual attraction.
2 people, independently