Practise the talk out loud for one person first

You have a date in the calendar: a presentation, a talk in class, a toast. Some part of you is hoping for a trick that makes the nerves go before then, or a way to get out of it. The plan below does not remove the nerves. It makes them smaller.

To get less afraid of speaking in front of people, practise the real talk out loud, first for one person and then for bigger groups, and expect to be nervous the whole way.

This page is for the ordinary, strong fear of speaking. If the fear runs through your whole week and not only the talk, the section near the end is for you.

Practise out loud, one step up at a time

Some people suggest facing the fear gradually: start with something small, such as speaking to friends, and make it harder in steps. One person suggests telling a short funny story to two people, seeing how it goes, and then going bigger. Another suggests starting with familiar stories told to friends, then reading written stories aloud, then speaking without the page, working on pace, pauses and how you hold attention, and finally giving the real talk at home until you can do it without looking at slides.

The US National Institute of Mental Health describes exposure therapy, one kind of treatment for anxiety, as progressively confronting the fears underneath. What the people above are describing is the same shape.

Some people say a good talk comes from thorough preparation: learn the content, practise it in front of a mirror or a recording, and keep going until it feels natural. One person suggests rehearsing in the room where you will speak, or in a similar big room, so that the physical feeling is already familiar. One person notes that getting into the room may not be possible for everyone, though it is likely possible for some college classes. One person suggests recording yourself on your phone to spot what to fix. One person suggests running through it with a colleague.

One person says to stop rehearsing in the last hour before you go on, and to put on a podcast or think about someone else’s talk, so you do not wind yourself up.

A club, if there is one near you

Some people suggest joining a regular public speaking club, because it gives you a safe, structured place to practise often and get feedback. One person says some members find it unpleasant but that the results show over time, and that you move at your own pace among beginners and experts. One person says a club or improv classes build confidence over time. One person says speaking or teaching often makes it ordinary. One person warns that a club can feel intimidating if you are already nervous.

This page does not cover free or low-cost alternatives, or what to do if there is no club nearby. A phone recording and one willing listener are where it can start.

The wait is often worse than the talk

One person says the anxiety is driven mostly by the build-up and the worst-case pictures in your head, and that once you start speaking you are mostly all right. One person suggests putting an end time on it in your mind: by three o’clock it will be over. One person suggests volunteering to speak first so the awkwardness is over quickly, and another gives a reason: the audience is often too busy worrying about its own turn to judge you harshly. There is a page here called Volunteer to go first, and another, The spotlight is mostly in your head.

In the room

Some people suggest using the body: slow breaths, an upright posture, eye contact, holding something to keep your hands steady. One person suggests looking around the room and resting your eyes on things like chairs or doors, because the audience cannot tell the difference; another person disagrees and says you should speak to individuals where you can.

Some people suggest changing how you see the audience: as listeners who want you to do well, not as judges, or putting your attention on the message and not on yourself. One person says you judge yourself far more harshly than the audience does. One person suggests thinking of it as sharing something useful and not as public speaking. One person suggests reading the racing feeling as excitement, the way a sprinter feels at the start line. Some people suggest picturing yourself giving a good speech on a big screen, with the details made up to be vivid.

One person suggests small body fixes: dressing lighter if you sweat, and a mint.

You do not have to feel nothing

One person says the fear of speaking may never fully leave, even in professionals, and gives the example of a lawyer who still feels it each time and manages it with deep breaths and knowing what they are saying. Some people say even experienced speakers sweat and get nervous, and that what you learn reduces the fear without ending it. One person says it is fine for your body to have its flight reaction and that you do not need to remove it in order to speak well.

People disagree about calming techniques. Some suggest them. One person says that trying to calm down can reinforce the anxiety and that it is better to do the task while anxious and let the feeling pass; another says that avoiding the feared situation, or using coping skills to push the feeling away, keeps the anxiety going. One person says repeated exposure is the main evidence-based method and that the research is easy to find. This page cannot settle which of these is right for you. The part both sides share is that you do the speaking.

A drink, a banana, a pill

Some people mention having a drink before a talk. One person who does says they do not recommend it. Some people warn it can leave you sloppy or smelling of alcohol, and one person says it clouds your judgement. This page leaves it out of the plan. The NHS says alcohol can add to the blood-pressure lowering effect of propranolol and make you dizzy.

Some people say that if the banana trick works at all, it is probably a placebo. One person, who says they are a clinical psychology PhD student, says the idea comes from natural-health sites with no clinical evidence behind it. This page leaves the banana out of the plan. If you like one anyway, that is your call; some people warn that a banana allergy can be serious, so skip it if you have one, and some people report heartburn or stomach upset from eating one before a speech.

Beta blockers are different: a prescription medicine, mentioned for the physical signs. One person calls them the only real answer, and another says preparation and mindset are enough and that it is better not to rely on medicine. How strong your physical symptoms are, for example whether shaking stops you from speaking, and whether the fear is clinical, are what a doctor can help you weigh. One person points out that they do nothing for the nervous feeling itself. Another points out that if the fear is clinical-level social anxiety, a beta blocker alone may not be enough, and a doctor should assess it. The safety box above carries what the NHS and the US National Institute of Mental Health say. One person also mentions sedatives called benzodiazepines, and says they are generally unhelpful for long-term anxiety. Some people warn of impairment and overdose risk with them. Those are a doctor’s decision, and this page goes no further.

Who this page is not for

If you fear speaking and also dread ordinary social life, so that you avoid school, work, friends or family, one person says severe fear may point to a clinical anxiety disorder that needs a medical assessment and not self-help alone. The US National Institute of Mental Health says anxiety that starts to cause problems in everyday life, such as avoiding social situations, is the time to seek professional help. In the UK, a GP is the place to start.

If the talk is tomorrow, you cannot climb the steps. What you can still do is say it out loud to one person once, and, if you can get into the room, in the room.

If you think the problem is that you are an introvert: one person says people mix up being an introvert with being shy, and that the advice may differ. Another says introversion is not a disease to recover from. One person says introverts can be excellent speakers once they have learned the skill.

And if you have nobody to practise in front of, one person suggests recording yourself on your phone to spot what to fix.