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relationships
They're having a hard time, not giving you one
One small thing you could do
Next meltdown — today's or this week's — say the reframe once inside your own head before you respond: this is happening to them, not at me. Nothing else changes yet. Just notice what your shoulders do when the sentence lands.
Someone handed me the words early in my son's life: he isn't giving me a hard time — he's having one. When nothing else worked, I'd tell him softly what heavy work it is, being brand-new.